Positive Talk

Do you know the impact of your words for your children? We’re not just talking about the words you say to them, but also the words you say about them. In this week’s blog post, we highlight the importance of speaking positively with and about your child, plus some helpful tips!

Imagine that you walk into work and your boss is openly complaining about you to your coworkers and other management. They’re talking about how you annoyed them, how you made a mistake last week, or how you disappointed them yet again. Maybe some (or all) of what they were saying was true, but to talk about those mistakes openly in front of peers? Just hearing that probably puts a pit in your stomach. Having a conversation about ways you could improve at work in a one-on-one setting with your boss is understandable, but complaining about your downfalls to coworkers is just not right!

Now replay that story in your head, but this time, you (the parent) are the one complaining about your child, and you are doing it openly in front of their siblings, other kids, or other parents. Imagine the pit that that would put in your child's stomach.

In Psalm 127:3, the Bible teaches that children are a blessing. Let's make sure our kids know how much of a blessing they are to us by how they hear us talking about them. We want them to feel loved and treasured by us as parents, so let's make sure our words line up with that! Here are some practical tips for how we can make sure our kids hear us talking positively and lovingly about them.

1.) Tell them! This may sound obvious, but tell your kids how much of a blessing they are to you! Tell your child how awesome you think they are, how good they are at whatever their hobbies may be, how much you love being with them, and how much God loves them.

2.) Tell others! Make sure your kids hear you talking positively about them to others. Compliment your child in front of their siblings and talk about how awesome they are in front of their peers or other adults. Don't talk about their flaws or ways they may have messed up in front of their friends, and be mindful about how you talk about your children in front of other adults.

3.) Draw a line between seeking godly advice and complaining about your child's problems. Our kids are not going to feel loved when we complain about them openly to others, even if the complaints are valid. There may be times where you need to talk to another adult about parenting difficulties you are experiencing, but be careful not to start a habit of complaining about your child to others under the guise of seeking advice. The Bible teaches us to seek wise counsel in challenging situations, but be mindful of and selective when talking about parenting challenges you are experiencing. Seek a wise, godly parent that you look up to and keep the conversation private. 

Try some of these steps today! Doing these things will help your child have a firm foundation in the relationship you have as parent and child. Our kids should know how much we love them by the words we say to and about them. Words should not be the only way we communicate love to our kids, but they do need to hear us talking positively about them over and over! There are so many things in life that your child may question, but let's make sure our children never have to question our love for them. 

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MecKidz